Safe Haven Marriage Intensive

THE SAFE HAVEN MARRIAGE INTENSIVE is a chance for couples to stop the arguing, heal hurts and once again experience each other as a safe haven. The intensive gives a couple the much needed time and place to change the negative ways of relating and foster an emotionally connected marriage. The intensive model is powerful as couples are able to focus on their marriage for several days and gain understanding and healing that often takes months of counseling or coaching.  A couple meets with Sharon May, Alan Hart or one of our experienced leaders, in a private setting and the intensive is personalized to the specific needs and crisis of the couple.       


Most couples come to the intensive feeling wounded and hopeless. Many are dealing with infidelity, betrayals, accumulated hurts, unresolved issues, distance, overwhelming differences and negative ways of dealing with difficult issues and frustration. The intensives are able to get to ‘the heart of the issues’ and begin making sense of and healing a very negative marriage relationship. Most couples say the intensive is different to any kind of couples counseling they have had previously.  The marriage intensives are based on Emotionally Focused Therapy, the most effective model out there. 


If you feel stuck, disconnected and not sure if you and your spouse will ever heal hurts and enjoy each other again...the intensive is worth the investment, work and effort.  Or if you feel your marriage could be richer, deeper and needs a renewal, then the intensive will help take your marriage to a closer, more intimate place.  It will help you foster a ‘safe haven marriage.’ 



Below are the various options for a marriage intensive.  The length of your intensive is based on the time you have available, the experience you want, and the level of distress in your marriage.  Of course, more time we have the more work can be done.  



1st day - 9:30 am to 4 pm

2nd day - 9:30 am to 4 pm



1st Day – 9:30 to 4 pm

2nd Day – 9:30 to 4 pm

3rd Day – 9:00 to 12:30 pm



1st day - 9:30 am to 4 pm 

2nd day - 9:30 am to 4 pm

3rd day - 9:30 am to 4 pm


4 Day EXECUTIVE MARRIAGE INTENSIVE JOURNEY - with either 1 or 2 therapists

This Emotionally Focused Therapy based marriage intensive is specially designed and personalized for the couple who wants an indepth experience.  The extended time and two therapists (Dr Sharon May and a co-counselor or coach) allows for much change over the few days.  This is our premier and most expensive of our intensives, but if you can afford the cost and time, it is a powerful experience.  




1. Understand the distress in your marriage and how you and your spouse got to where you are

2. Understand your argument cycle and how it keeps you emotionally disconnected

3. Make sense of the hurts and wounds that have built up over the years

4. Learn how to talk from your hearts about your fears, hurts, needs & emotions

5. Begin a journey of healing past hurts, including attachment injuries, infidelity & betrayals

6. Begin to see each other differently as you build understanding and acceptance

7. Learn new ways to argue, talk, connect and relate to one another

8. Learn to grow and foster a safe haven where each feels loved, cared for and understood

9. Talk about and resolve the hot topics (that typically trigger arguments) in more constructive ways


The Safe Haven Marriage Intensives are based on the most well-researched and highly successful marital therapy model of today, Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT). The model shows a 75% to 80% rate of change from distress to a safe haven and 90% rate of significant improvement.  The Safe Haven Relationship model integrates Emotionally Focused Therapy with attachment theory and neurobiology of arguing (with real life application and much humor), making the experience meaningful and marriage-changing.  Although we can't guarantee your outcome, by attending an Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) based intensive you are giving your marriage the best care and chance possible. 


If you are in a difficult season in your marriage, we would like to be part of your healing and growing your marriage relationship.  No matter if your marriage only needs a tune-up or is filled with hurts or betrayals, we would like to help you foster a ‘safe haven marriage.’  We would like to offer you hope.  The Safe Haven Marriage Intensive is very different to other kinds of couples therapy.  That is because of the well known marital model the intensive is based upon, as well as the impact focusing for several days in a row has on a marriage.



If you are interested in an intensive,

    1.  Please email us for further information, pricing and available dates ( or call 626-614-4555).  

    2.  We will email you the details, as well as pricing and dates available.

    3.  Select your dates, then complete the introductory form and return it to us with your deposit information.  

    3.  At that time, we will confirm your intensive.  

    4.  You can then book your airflight and hotel accommodations.  

We will help you each step of the way, so to make the process of scheduling the intensive as smooth as possible.


You would fly into San Diego, California and stay at a local hotel of your choice.  You will then meet with Dr Sharon May, Alan Hart, or your qualified counselor in Carlsbad or Pasadena, California.  If you are local, we recommend you put your responsibilities and distractions on hold, for the several days of the intensive..   This way your full emotional attention is given to the intensive, and evenings are spent processing, relaxing and preparing for the following day. 



Dr Sharon May usually has Monday through Friday available for a 2 to 4 day intensive.   Alan Hart usually conducts the 2 to 3 day intensives over the Friday, Saturday and Sunday weekend.  Please email for specific dates.  Know that dates fill up quickly, so let us know your first option as soon as possible.


- Couples intensives begin at 9:30am and end at 4pm

-You will work with your counselor all day, with a break in the morning

-You will have a lunch break to relax and refuel, as well as a time to process all you have worked on

-In the afternoon, you will continue to work with your counselor and at the end of the day will be given an exercise to do to expand and solidify what you are learning

-At the end of your intensive, you will collaborate with your counselor as to a follow-up plan so to encourage your continued growth and maturity, as well as keep the changes in your marriage last

-We will provide tea, coffee, but please feel free to bring with you any goodies that will help you get through the day, and yes, dress comfortable as you will be sitting all day.

-In preparation it might be good for you to review the history of your relationship, the hurts and stuck places, and what you want to work on during the intensive. 

Regarding Insurance Coverage for the Intensives

Most insurance companies do not cover the cost of intensives. When requested, Safe Haven will provide a detailed super-bill. Safe Haven does not submit to insurance companies on behalf of any of our therapists. We recommend that all clients contact their insurance company/human resource dept. prior to signing up for an Intensive. Certain Safe Haven Intensives and Seminars are considered life coaching and are not covered by any insurance.  


*Intensive times are flexible

Heal your broken marriage, discover what to do when your marriage is hurting, make your marriage better, learn how to have a happy marriage,  Safe Haven is an Emotionally Focused Therapy based marriage intensive.  The best way to heal your marriage.