The Safe Haven Relationship Center was started by Dr Sharon May and is a unique Relationship Center comprised of well-trained therapists, associates and life coaches in Carlsbad, California.  Many of our clients come from all over the country to attend one of our highly successful marriage intensives, individual personal growth intensives, and leadership trainings.  Dr Sharon May, Alan Hart and the Safe Haven Team teach world-wide, attracting people from all over to come for hope, healing and training.

Our vision is to be a resource for you and your family through all the seasons of life.  We want to bring hope as well as provide practical ways to help you heal, grow and flourish so you can love well in your relationships and live a meaningful life.  

Our aim is to provide cutting-edge counseling, innovative intensives and seminars to help you:  

  • grow as a person, become the best you

  • get through life’s difficult, traumatic and painful struggles

  • grieve, adjust and transition through life’s ever changing seasons

  • discover a meaningful life vision, set goals accordingly, overcome what keeps you stuck

  • develop a balanced, character-centered, emotionally healthy way of life

  • restore and enrich your marriage

  • learn how to parent the best you can, strengthen and foster a safe haven family

  • improve your personal and work relationships






  • Traditional Weekly Counseling Sessions – You choose a therapist to meet with on a weekly bases for one hour to several hours at a time  


  • Intensives for Couples and Individuals – the extended time and innovative format allows for much progress in only a few days, it is the equivalent to about 6 months of coaching or counseling


*   Safe Haven Marriage Intensives - In the Private format, one couple meets with one therapist for 2 to 4 days.  In the Group format, 3 to 4 couples meet with 2 therapists over a several day period.  Best help for broken marriages.


*  Becoming Real Personal Growth Intensives for Individuals – this experience promotes personal and professional growth.  Fosters character growth and impacts how you love, live and work.  Format is a blend of powerful teaching and meaningful process groups.  

  • Seminars on marriage, parenting, emotional intelligence in the work place, managing transitions, stressors and struggles of life so to thrive


  • Training for Therapists in Emotionally Focused Therapy and Safe Haven Model as well as case consultation with Dr Sharon May.  Finding a good couples therapist is just as hard as finding one to go to, that is why Dr May is passionate about training counselors who want to be really good couples therapists.







The therapy model our work is based upon the “Safe Haven Relationship Model”.  It is an integration of Emotionally Focused Therapy, faith, attachment theory, neurobiology of relationships as well as cutting-edge relationship and emotional intelligence research.  Dr Sharon May is the originator of the Safe Haven Model.  The model helps people understand the way they relate in life, identifying their hurts, internal working models and stuck places and moves people through a process of processing their deeper emotions, fears and longings. This way a new experience of themselves arise allowing for healing and new ways of being in life and relationships.

Emotionally Focused Therapy was originally co-conceptualized by Dr Susan Johnson and is the most well-researched and highly successful marital therapy model of today. The model shows a 75% rate of total change and 90% rate of significant change. That means, after going to counseling with an EFT couples therapist, 7 out of 10 couples make it and perceive their marriage to be a safe haven.  And research shows that even after 4 years, couples are still doing better than ever.    


At Safe Haven Relationship Center, we believe we were created to live and grow in relationship with others.  We were designed to live a meaningful life while loving and being loved by others, working, exploring, creating and playing.  We do our best in life when we are whole, balanced, well-rounded individuals in close connected relationships with those we love.  Counseling helps us become aware of our vulnerabilities, hurts, stuck places and the unproductive ways we cope with our pain and struggles.  The counseling experience helps us understand how our past, fears and dragons have shaped who we are.  Counseling also helps us navigate through hardships and struggles so we can grow, mature and become all God has for us to be.  And since our ‘character’ is the summation of who we are, growing our ‘character’ allows us to live and love well.  Counseling is also a way for us to obtain support, wisdom and direction as we get through hurts, traumas, difficult transitions and tough situations.  It helps us not only get through, but become a better person, getting the most out of this precious life God has gifted us.   What often scares us the most, is not the painful situation we are facing, but rather facing it alone.  We were created to grow in community, and we do our best when connected to meaningful community of caring people.  Come grow with us.



If you are in a difficult season in your marriage, we would like to be part of your healing and growing your marriage relationship. No matter if your marriage only needs a tune-up or is filled with hurts or betrayals, we would like to help you foster a ‘safe haven marriage.’ We would like to offer you hope. The Safe Haven Marriage Intensive is very different to other kinds of couples therapy. That is because of the well known marital model the intensive is based upon, as well as the incredible impact focusing for several days in a row has on a marriage.